How Can We Help You? (Part 4 of 4)

When you are pregnant with your second do you think “How will I ever love this baby as much as I love my first?” Do you wonder “Will my firstborn be sad, or mad upon his or her baby sibling’s arrival?” Or how about “How will I ever handle TWO (or three??) children at the same time?”

Don’t worry!!! You are NOT alone. Almost all “second” time moms have these thoughts, and feelings. And it IS an adjustment, but The Baby Mavens can help you with that too, of course. 🙂

We OFTEN times are hired by the pregnant mom of a two year old who isn’t quite sure what she needs help with when her second child arrives, but she is certain she will need help of some sort! And watching your firstborn become a big brother, or big sister is often times an experience you don’t want to miss! Wait until the very first time your older “baby” shares his most priced toy with HIS “baby”, your heart will just melt.

Sometimes the evening is a more challenging time of day for moms juggling a new baby and a toddler, or older child. There is dinner to be made, and sometimes homework to be done, and well- that baby probably wants to eat right smack dab in the middle of it all! Having a Maven there to help could look a little like this:

It’s 4pm, I arrive to a screaming toddler (he wanted the orange cup for a snack, not the red one), a crying baby in mom’s arms, and mom looking like she is on the verge too. I bend down to my buddy’s level and in a quiet voice remind him to just use his words and ask for the orange cup, he snuffles a little and says “pwease I have owange cup?” I quickly trade the offended cup out, and make a quick bottle for the baby. Then I grab said crying infant from mom, and ask “How about you have a break for a few? Can I make you a cup of tea?” She replies: “I just want a shower.” So I send Mom off to the bathroom, and shuffle the toddler into the family room with me and the baby. I settle the baby in for the bottle, and manage to read the toddler a few stories while we cuddle on the couch. The baby falls asleep, so I put her down in the nearby Pack n’ Play, and get some crayons and coloring books out for my little friend.

While he is coloring quietly, I sneak over to the kitchen and quickly throw the dishes in the sink in the dishwasher and wash the bottle. I notice there is a casserole on the counter, with directions from a friend. So I turn on the oven, and make Mom a cup of tea. When she emerges from the shower, she notices that things are a little cleaner and a little quieter so I encourage her to have a rest, which of course she graciously accepts! I peek in on the baby and her big brother, baby is sound asleep and brother is still quietly coloring away. So I sit next to him on the couch and fold a basket of laundry that was left there. I put the casserole in the oven, and get some plates and silverware out for the toddler. I know they will feed him first but that mom will wait for dad to come home to eat with him.

Just as I am sitting Big Brother down for dinner, the baby starts to make some noise and Mom comes out. She sits and nurses the baby, and we catch up for a few minutes. Then she passes the baby to me and she sits with her oldest while he eats. I take the baby over to the sink for a quick bath, and get her all snuggled up in her jammies. Mom then takes her big boy in the other room for a bath. I pop the baby in the Moby that I brought, and clean up from dinner, putting two plates aside to heat up when Dad comes home. I then take a peak at the hampers in the baby’s room, and in her brother’s, and quickly throw any dirty laundry in the washing machine. Mom and Big Brother come out of the bathroom, and head to his room for his books and bed. I bend down so that he can give his baby sister a kiss on the top of her head, and he gives me a quick hug too! (How sweet?!?!)

Mom comes out a little while later, and finds the baby swaddled in her bassinet. Dinner is just about ready, and she has a few more minutes to relax before Dad comes in. I tell her “Put your feet up and throw on that show you have been watching on Netflix! Have a great night, and see you on Thursday!”

When I leave a shift feeling like Mom has gotten to have a little break, and her babies were well cared for I totally feel a little like I should be wearing a cape! 🙂 Just call us Super Doulas!

*laurie

Advertisements

How Can We Help You? (Part 1 of 4)

Parents often ask us what a typical shift looks like, or how specifically we can help them during their 4th trimester.  We can’t really answer this question, because every family is unique, and every day in every family is different.  Today I would like to share with you a recent “Typical shift” which I had. Watch for further posts in the series, too. Maybe one of these makes sense for you or your family? Maybe you envision something entirely different? How can we help you?

SHIFT A:

Daytime support for  first-time new mom with a 10-day old baby girl.  

9:00 am – Arrive and “check in”, asking mom how she is feeling after her C-Section, and how baby is doing.  Find that mom is healing fairly well and that mom and baby seem to have established a pretty good nursing relationship. Mom is both anxious and tired, but not overly so. I ask mom how I can best support her over the next 4 hours. “I am not sure. How does this work? I guess do whatever you think needs to get done. I don’t usually get off the couch because she nurses a lot.”

9:30 – Mom and baby are settled on the couch, nursing and watching the Today Show. I make mom a cup of tea, then start washing some of the adorable outfits baby received for her Naming Ceremony over the weekend. I sit with mom while the laundry is going and we discuss some of her anxieties.  Baby has not yet had a bath, so perhaps I will be able to help with that before the shift is over.

10:00 – “Do you have a dinner plan?” I ask, “Maybe I can get something started for you?” Mom says ok, maybe I can make some type of soup on this dreary winter day. After rummaging around the fridge and pantry, I declare that it’s a Vegetable Barley Kind of Day! Mom thinks that’s a great idea and texts her wife to please bring some some crusty sourdough bread and a salad, which will go perfectly with the soup at dinnertime.

11:00 – Baby is nursing like a champ. Again. I get mom another cup of tea and we talk about baby wearing.  Mom has used the Moby successfully but is hesitant to try the Ergo.  Baby is under 8 pounds so she would need to use the Infant Insert.  We will try that the next time I come.

12:00 – By  now the laundry is done and folded and the soup is simmering away in the Crock Pot.  I make mom a turkey sandwich and cut up some melon for her.  I offer to hold the baby so she can eat and mom happily agrees. (YAY! I get some baby snuggles!) 

12:30 – Mom decides that her wife would be disappointed to miss out on the first bath, so we postpone that.  A better use of my time is for me to keep snuggling the wee one while mom gets a nice hot shower for herself.

1:00 – Mom is all showered, the kitchen is tidied up, baby’s laundry is put away in the nursery.  I hand mom her water bottle & a freshly diapered girl who is ready to nurse. I head out the door, feeling satisfied that the rest of the day should go smoothly for mom.

So there you have it – 4 hours of a typical or maybe not-so-typical shift of a postpartum doula. How can we help you?

*Lauren

I bet you are EXHAUSTED!

When you start announcing your pregnancy, and your belly starts growing people will for sure start to comment “get some sleep now while you can!”, and “you won’t sleep again for 18 years!”. Helpful, right? None of those comments will begin to prepare you for the sleep deprived, shell shocked, zombie-like state you may be in during those first weeks and months after giving birth. As if putting your body through the trauma of giving birth, and adjusting to the hormones wasn’t bad enough. Now you are lucky to get an hour or two of sleep at a time. There is not enough coffee in the world to help you now. (Not to mention the advice that people will give you about drinking coffee if you are breastfeeding!)

Tired young couple yawning in bed

Take a deep breath new Moms and Dads! There is help, and relief out there!

The Baby Mavens offer OVERNIGHT newborn, infant, and baby help. Your Maven will come to your home at night, usually a little before you are hoping to “go to bed” for the night. She will bring your precious new baby into a guest room, or even the living room, and get this- SHE will get up with baby when he wakes to be fed. If Mom is breastfeeding, she will come to your room and gently wake you. Mom feeds her baby, gives him a kiss goodnight, and goes BACK TO BED. Your Maven will burp, change, swaddle, and get baby back to sleep. And if your darling baby is bottle fed, and you WANT to sleep, that’s what you do. Just keep sleeping. THROUGH the night. The WHOLE night.
Imagine waking up the next morning, feeling refreshed, and ready to take on the day. Haven’t you thought, just once- “If only I could get just ONE night of sleep!” Well, you can! Call The Baby Mavens today. We even offer bundles and packages so that you get a discount by booking a few nights together.
When you are having a tough day, you can say to yourself: “My Baby Maven is coming tonight! I can get through this, I get to sleep tonight!”